Cake Or Death?

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Posted by Chad on February 22, 2006

That’s what one trip to Duane Reade cost me today…. Normally, I go there to pick up one or two items – maybe some Advil, maybe some toothpaste. But not on this day.

Today, I went with a mission. A purpose. It was a decision that I struggled with internally for a week or so. Do I or don’t I? So many people who I respect have expressed their contempt for what I wanted to purchase. Yet, regardless, today, at noon, I decided “I do”.


I went out and bought the damn Fusion. And a damn 4-pack of cartridges. To the tune of $23.28. Plus tax.

To justify the trip as something I needed to do (and not something I did just for this one item that in all honesty I didn’t need in the first place), I picked up various other things: shampoo and conditioner, soap, some smokes…. Fourty-four twenty-one.

So a big YOU’RE WELCOME goes out in advance to the Gillette Marketing team. Ya’ got me. Job well done, you sonsuhbitches.

I swear to God On High that this shave had better be above and beyond a night alone with a drunk and uninhibited Jeremy Bloom.

Is fusion.jpg equal to jeremyshirtless.jpg ?

Only time will tell….


10 Responses to “$44.21”

  1. AGJ said

    not sure I can top your new razor, but I’d like to attempt to give you the poor gay man’s equivalent to “a night alone with a drunk and uninhibited Jeremy Bloom”. hehehe

  2. Malcontent said

    I did exactly the same thing. Duane Reade. Fusion. Plus refill blades.

    The sad part is, I have a perfectly serviceable Mach 3 in my bathroom with approximately 14,000 refill blades.

    I’m not a zombie.

  3. Tim said

    I’m holding out but I’ll fall. Can the fusion blades fit on the turbo handles?

  4. Chad said

    No they can’t. I used it last night, and it’s definitely a noticeably different shave. Better than the Mach3? Maybe, maybe not. Worth the money? Probably not. My Mach3 was doing just fine.

    I just have a weak personality when it comes to this sort of thing….

  5. You’re putting a lot of pressure on a razor aren’t ya?

    I’m telling you, 3 blades is the optimum number for a shave. You’ll never do better than the Mach 3.

  6. Kath said

    Ok, so I’m not a guy, but I totally got twisted into buying a Venus (blue, if you wanna know) even though I had about a thousand little unused pink plastic ones in my drawer. But I like it, so I don’t feel quite so bad…

  7. Chad said

    I’m not sure Kev…. The 5 blade thing is pretty nice.

  8. Chip said

    ONE blade’s enough for me.

  9. Chad said

    Chip…. Take that great shave you get with one solitary blade, ok? Now… multiply that by FIVE.

  10. Chip said

    My face would be a minefield of ingrown whiskers.

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